For most of us, the ”magic” number is 30 — ideally, we’d be happily married to not a fckboi, be the CEO of a conglomerate, have a place of our own and two kids (twins, please) with another one on the way. Key word being ideally. While some of the aforementioned things are easily doable, certain things are up to fate. Read: getting pregnant.
Anyone who isn’t a millennial probably grew up being cautioned that all unprotected sex = a sure case of pregnancy. But as we get more informed, that ’s not always the case. Statistics show that women between the ages of 20 to 24 have an 86 per cent chance of conceiving, while women aged 30 to 34 have a 63 per cent chance (but this doesn’t mean you can go and toss out your condoms, OK!?).
A significant drop, but that ’s not all — the chances of women of all those ages becoming pregnant after trying for two years is 90 to 94 per cent, meaning some, who would be technically classified as infertile, end up conceiving in their second year of trying. Despite these stats, infertility is still on the up, and we’re being conditioned to perceive
our ovaries and their functions as fragile and fleeting. The feelings of urgency and negativity intensify if we aren’t in a LTR or in the process of being ”locked down”. Infertility can be a very real and distressing experience, but perceived infertility has its own complications.
Some of us take the comment of ”have trouble conceiving” to mean we don’t need contraception, and end up with an unplanned pregnancy. So while most of us have plans to have a family, coming to grips with this term means understanding fertility, which goes a long way in replacing assumptions with facts and knowledge. The more we can break down the stigma surrounding the issue, the better. Here, three readers with different experiences open up…
ANGELINA*, 24, EXPECTED THE UNEXPECTED
“I always thought that I would have trouble conceiving. I came from a family history of women having trouble getting pregnant — I was the only child and my mum suffered a few miscarriages before giving up. I was diagnosed with endometriosis too, and even though the doctor said this wouldn’t necessarily affect fertility, I just sort of assumed that it wouldn‘t be easy for me to conceive.
“I still got on the Pill anyway, and I was in a long-term relationship. My boyfriend proposed and we felt like we were in a really good place. I stopped the Pill and there was one night we got the condom on about three minutes in. Clearly, it was too late…
Yep. I got pregnant from the fluids before that. “I never thought it was even possible or happen in the first place, let alone to me, someone I thought would probably have a lot of trouble getting pregnant. But I did and I had the baby last year after we fasttracked the wedding. The result was worth it but now I know, lesson learned!”