Being a clumsy girl is hard. Apart from the daily struggles and fending questions about being in an abusive relationship (“I’m just really clumsy, I swear!”), there are a myriad of other struggles that the normal graceful folk just wouldn’t understand.
At least twice a week. And you will just happen to be in white when it happens. You’ve learned to carry a bib around, or just eat your breakfast in your pajamas before you leave the house.
2. Food with sauces are your worst enemy
Pastas with marinara sauce? Forget about it.
3. You will ruin every pair of tights you have
Whether you wear them as a fashion statement or just so you don’t flash a bunch of strangers in your mini skirt, you’ll get holes, snag ’em, and get runs in them twice as quickly as normal people do.
4. You’ll either smudge or chip your nail polish when you do it yourself
Every girl loves getting their nails done, but either it’s impatience or typing too aggressively, you will chip or smudge it and you’ve learned to not spend money on it, but just DIY.
5. You would never look graceful in heels
You literally can’t walk in heels. You love them, but you trip over oxygen in flip flops at least twice a day so high heels are just a no-no. And dancing is completely out of the question.
Suede is absolutely off-limits.
The salesgirls will try to tempt you, but you know that you’ll just walk into a puddle or spill a drink onto the beautiful fabric so you walk away singing Miley Cyrus Wrecking Ball in your head, “Don’t you ever say I just walked away, I will always want youuuuuuu…”