The grass is always greener on the other side – after being in a long term relationship throughout the whole of my early 20s, I wonder if it was even anywhere close to worth it. Contrary to your understanding, the love is real between my human and I, but at only 25, I still can’t help but look back and ask myself “why”.
The circumstances of our relationship forced us to grow up faster than we’d liked, and we relied on each other too heavily as an emotional support system. Although we can both agree that we are grateful to have had our lives intertwined, the feeling of losing out on our early 20s is mutual.
He was apprenticing at that time, and the culture that came with it was…. traditional. I was still figuring out who and what I wanted to “be”, but didn’t exactly have the financial capacity to allow me the luxury of taking my time. You may feel as if this comes across as a little harsh, but the truth of the matter is, we’ve both sacrificed too much for someone we loved at a very young stage.
I’ve reached a point of my life that has made me more aware of how women age – industry wise, and within social standings; It’s not exactly Madonna all decades round. As much as we’d like to advocate risky progression at any age, the harsh reality is that opportunities love the young, and one of the main reasons why, is because responsibilities have yet to mass themselves in drowning one’s person.
As with any other relationship, having to nurture one includes considering how your choices and actions affect the other person. Believe me when I say that we’ve both foregone opportunities in the preservation of us. Bluntly putting it, you’re accountable, and at 21, it felt very heavy for both parties.
Then there’s that thing with youth’s innocence (or more like naiveness). Jealousy and possessiveness can so easily be misconstrued into something positive. However much you convince yourself that a passionate love is the best kind of love, too much of it can end with a bitter bite of realistic impracticality – guilty as charged for that.
Maybe it’s just me, and this is just one side of the coin, so you have every right to feel like I’m a pessimistic Debbie Downer. My point is, if you’re going to commit yourself to just one person at that phase of your life, find someone who is willing to make the same amount of sacrifices for you, and not for the sake of having a relationship, cause it could end up being the best, or worst decision you’ve made – I’ve yet to figure out my fate, and I can only pray that I’m the lucky exception.