6 Pieces Of Advice From My Mum That I Now Think Are Actually Legit
When we go through life, one thing’s for sure – people come and go. Only a few people in the world truly have my back and one of my ride-or-dies is my mom. Every mother-daughter relationship is different and we’re lucky if we have a mother who gets us and we feel like we can talk to her about anything at all.
I didn’t always see our relationship as great TBH. Growing up in our teens, as we know, can be a tough ride. For some of us more than others. We feel misunderstood at times, especially by our parents. It’s awkward talking to them about stuff, even though deep down you really want to.
Let’s face it – mothers know best. And I’m super thankful she’s around because no one knows me like she does.
Here are some moments when my mom gave me advice that I’m forever grateful for.
When she dissed the boys I liked from the start
When you’re a teenager and a cute boy tells you he likes you, it’s so thrilling your heart feels like it could burst. You want to share your new beau with the world — yes, even your parents. But then your mom takes one look at him and she immediately disapproves.
You’re thinking, “Wait, hold up. You’re not even going to try to make the effort to know this guy?” It seems totally unreasonable and judgmental.
So you get rebellious and keep seeing him anyway only to realise that he was pretty wrong for you. You see that it’s probably not going to last and your mom was right all along. Isn’t it strange how she just knows? From just one look at the guy? It’s baffling.
that my BFF hasn’t been texting me as much ’cause she actually needs me more
When life gets more and more hectic, you and your friends start texting less. It’s the occasional “How’s it going? Updates please!” once a month. For a while, it bothered me and I wondered if it was something to do with them moving on with life. Or maybe I was moving on.
Speaking to my mom about it was eye-opening. She told me that the friends who used to text me all the time were reaching out less because maybe I haven’t been checking up on them enough. It’s weird how it wasn’t obvious at first but there it was — the truth staring at my face. It comes down to being there for others, especially those you care about, ‘cause they’re all you’ve got.
When she said I needed to rely only on myself, no matter what
Seeing our friends in relationships being all happy and in love, it makes us think about getting together with someone. Not just for the sake of it – we still want that love and connection. But we can get blinded by that desire and forget that a relationship shouldn’t be an end goal.
And so, you get into relationships that you really thought could work. But whenever they didn’t, the person who was always there for me through every heartbreak was my mom. At the end of the day, she wants the best for me and would stick by me even through my mistakes.
I learnt that your life can be full and complete even without a partner. And that’s one of the most valuable advice my mom’s ever given me.
her ultimate beauty tip: Don’t touch your eyebrows
When I was growing up, all my girlfriends were threading their eyebrows. It was a monthly routine getting their brows shaped, and well, it did make me wonder if I should be doing it, too. My mom was totally against it, telling me not to do anything to my brows. TBH I didn’t really want to add another thing to my beauty routine. Facials already cost a lot. But it seemed like everyone was touching up their brows now and then.
Now, I thank my lucky stars that I listened to my mom. To this day, I’ve never tried threading and just got a few strands plucked by a make-up artist when there was an event coming up. That’s about it. Thick, full brows forever.
To always work towards being independent
My mom has always been supportive of anything I do and she gets so excited when I talk about my work or projects. But whenever I have stretches where I don’t have anything going on, she starts getting fidgety and worried. And while that stressed me out a lot, I realise that her wanting me to have something going on in my life, something I’m working towards, has made me who I am today.
It doesn’t matter if you haven’t figured out your path, your purpose, or even your passion. What matters is that you’re out there, trying different things out and you’ll eventually find that you’re doing the grind. And that’s something to be extremely proud of!
That we can allow ourselves to feel our emotions, but they’re not always real
My emotions can get the better of me, especially during the time of the month. I start thinking about all the things that could potentially go wrong in my life or I’d get into arguments easily with my loved ones. It’s a constant struggle that I felt I couldn’t really take control of.
My mom reminded me that while it’s good to allow ourselves to feel emotions, they aren’t always how we really feel. It could be purely biological, something happening in our insides that’s affecting us. Just keeping this in mind has helped me navigate through my thoughts and feelings during those pesky PMS stretches.
With every close relationship like a mother and daughter’s, there’s bound to be ups and downs, some arguments here and there. But at the end of the day, my mom’s my go-to person and I’m so lucky to have her in my life.